Find Your Sunshine

She use to be the sweetest girl

Eyes of pearl

A self esteem that could rock the world

She saw noone above her

No one could stand in her way as she

Strut her way through the crowds

Taking long and confident steps 

With her 6' heals

Never stopping for a soul

Not acknowledging 

The rocks on the ground

The puddles on the floor 

The gum upon the grass

The poop up on the concrete 

Then a man entered 

The gates of her heaven

Leaving her eternally 

Bruised and battered. 

Now she walks around

Head upon the ground

The cigarette smoke filling her lungs

I can almost see the cancer build up. 

Her hair always in a bun 

Her nails are left undone

What happened to that pretty girl

Who now lives by the gun. 

Now the rocks are the only things she walks on

The puddles are of tears 

The sticking of the gum upon that grass

Represents her being trapped in some maze

Where she can't find 

An exit to her dreams

And the poop on the concrete is just the shit that fills the walls of her home. 

What happened to that girl 

That could conquer the world

I want to walk over to her 

And get her off the ground

I want to say

Girl look at you

Please remove the frown

I want to take her by the hand 

And take her to the sand

Show her a place of peace

But will she understand 

I want to help you find your sunshine

I'll come up with a plan

I'm not gonna be just another a soul

That fills you up with "I told you so's"

I just want you to go back to being

The girl I use to know. 

Happy Anniversary

Here's to

The tears,

The heartaches

The headaches

And the sorrow

The lies

The cheating

The waiting til tomorrow

The chaos

The arguments 

The "I wish I never met yous"

To the nights you said

"but baby, relax, she is just some random hoe"

To the nights I spent alone

To the waiting by the phone

Happy Anniversary

To the love 

I never got to know. 

If Only You'd Let Me

Street lights and
the moon light
greet me as I step out of my taxi.

The point of my heal
touches the concrete
as my legs slowly began to exit.

"Welcome to Montreal"
states the chauffeur.

I then began to walk the strip.
The fluorescent lights
Kindle over my body
while accentuating
each curve and intensifying
the redness in my dress.

I saw him stare as he bit down on his lip
glaring at me
From my heals
to my lips
From my eyes
to my hips

He lended his hand.
Greeted me like a gentleman
as he uttered the words
"My lady, may I walk with you?
Tell you all the things I want
to do to you
Tell you that your structure
is made of gold
and that your skin reminds me
of the petals of the roses
that I'd love to bombard you with...
Tell you that your smile
shines so bright
It'll send the sun into retirement.
Tell you that the the almonds you
refer to as your eyes
captivate me
and your smell leaves me breathless
as I think to myself
I long to give you the world...

If only you'd let me"

Malicious Dragon

When she was young with dreams of being a princess and dancing with the fairies, a man entered the room. "Let's play" he says with a creepy look on his face. To gain her trust he begins to fulfill her fantasies of being a princess. Buys her dresses, crowns and the most beautiful plastic little girl heals she had ever laid her eyes on. Once the trust is gained he begins to invite her downstairs. Says that this will be their magic kingdom and that in this kingdom, no evil dragon could ever come and get them. Who knew that he was to become that evil dragon. They go on to build a fortress with some old blankets, one which happened to be HER "blankie". He then whispers "Lets watch a movie" as he slowly rubs her shoulder, making his way up to her hair. Not once did he cease to smile. Overwhelmed with excitement, she goes on to fetch all of her dolls and proceeds to line them up next to her anticipating the commencement of what she thought was going to be, a beautiful Monday afternoon. Little did she know. This would be the day her imagination would be taken away. He proceeded to play this movie. Told her it was a very popular movie and that once you watch it, you have to play the game that the actors were playing. He continued to describe these rules while she nodded her head in agreement. The movie began. The first scene consisted of a woman laying down. She was not wearing any clothes and appeared to be comfortable in her settings. She began to talk in a crazy, hyperactive voice. As if she was running out of breath. The woman placed her hands on her body and began to rub herself in enjoyment. A male partner then joined her and immediately unbuckled his pants. "What's that?" the little girl asked in confusion. "It's just the man's sword" answered the older man. "Why is she putting the sword in her mouth?" continued the little girl. "To clean it before the game begins" he stated while slowly beginning to rub on his legs. The man then laid on the woman and she began making sounds that the little girl was unfamiliar with. "I don't like this movie" she stated, "it looks like he's hurting her!". As the little girl began to rise to gravitate her attention towards something else, the man then grabs her and says "I wanna play a game. Just like they did in that movie."

I Miss You..

I want to dedicate this one to you

My love...
Today was a rainy day
Somehow nature always seems to be
in tune with my emotions

I miss you

The sentiments that I am facing,
not even Shakespeare could put into words.
My mind longs for you
I am intrigued by you
Want nothing but you
I looked forward to you

But I do understand
You are unattainable.

I miss your voice
I miss the way your body
illuminates with excitement
once my hand is placed upon yours..

I miss the way you blush
When I kiss you with compliments
and I embrace you
While letting you know that
YOU, my love, are the most beautiful thing
I have ever rested my eyes upon

Beautiful you are
Inside as much as on the surface.

Last night
I pray I never relive

I miss your heart...
I miss the sweet melody that tickled my ear drum
every time you spoke

I hope to see you again
I hope to be granted another opportunity
to watch the moon entwine with the sun
to greet us on a beautiful Saturday night.

I hope you never forget
What we had was more than a crush
I promise you will live on in my heart
As the most beautiful soul
I've ever had the chance to know..

Dear lover...

You're on my mind

I don't know what to say...

Just a friend...

Friendship. 

Something so meaningful

So beautiful

So cherished

So desired

Yet..

So misunderstood...

I drown in my loneliness

I just want a friend

To love me

And understand me

Never judge me

Or betray me

Someone to hold my hand

Walk with me through dark times

Always stands up for me

Someone who sees the best in me. 

Your Eyes...

Your eyes

They tell no lies...

I look at you and know..

They don't put on a show.

When we converse I fall

Deep into them. I read

Them and they tell me that

Everything you are saying is

Pure.

Genuine.

Heartfelt.

Your eyes?

They give me the answer to any

Question I may have.

When I'm uncertain

One glance and all of the mysteries

Are revealed..

Tonight?

Your eyes

They spoke of a truth that I've never seen before...

I knew then..

When I no longer saw myself

That your eyes no longer desired to meet mine

They no longer wanted to see me

That you lost all interest

That your mind began to wonder..

I knew then

That this was my cue to leave

Cuz your eyes?

They tell no lies.

Don't Wait Til the Roses Die

Funny..

Now that the birds no longer sing

And the kids no longer smile

And the sun no longer shines 

And the moon no longer sparkles..

That's when you want me?

When I gave it all to you

Made all your wishes come true

Kissed all your pains away

Made all of your sorrows vanish

It was no longer me that you wanted 

So what's the problem now?

Do you miss being sun-kissed

And smelling the flowers when you wake

And being woken up by the sweet sound of love

And knowing what it's like to be appreciated?

I figured you would. 

Never took you for a poet

But I do appreciate the effort

Next time do remember

That when someone gives you spring--

Year round

Make sure you love them

You appreciate them

You show them daily

That you'd be hopeless without them...

Don't wait til the roses die

I Want To Write You A Poem

I want to write you a poem

Tell you my deepest sentiments

Tell you that your smile is the fuel

to the flame that illuminates when I am

in your presence.

I want to sing you a song

I want the passion in my voice to shine through.

I want you to feel what I feel,

the butterflies, the goosebumps, and the tummy aches.

I want the tone to be sweet

I want to romance you with a lovely melody.

I want to strip down.

Remove all articles of clothing and disguises.

Remove the walls from around my heart.

I want to feel you.

I want you to see me.

To love me,

share my dreams,

my aspirations,

see my capabilities

and rescue me.

And we dare to call them fools

And we dare to call them fools -- those who speak of love. They speak of it with passion and intensity. And we dare to call them fools. They feel the heat they see the fireworks. They speak of butterflies and describe the seas. They believe it's magic they believe that it's true. Yet we dare to call them fools. The fool that you are for believing and seeing the unreal and unattainable. The fool that you are to believe the love that you are describing will never burn you nor forsake you. The fool that you are for believing that the tales the fairies spoke of were the truth. Fool that I was for thinking of all this was foolishness. Fool that I was to believe that it didn't exist. That you didn't see fireworks, that the butterflies never came. That the flame never lit and the birds never sang. Fool that you were to believe that one person's kiss could put you into a bliss. There's no longer a fool, I believe that it's true if I told you this story you wouldn't believe it's the truth. The fool that I was and I needed it too. If I was to tell you, you would think that way too. Fool that she is to believe this is true. 

Fatal Attraction

There’s an attraction with no affection. I’m drawn mentally and physically. Meeting him has opened my eyes to the potential future that I could have if I open my mind more and cease to settle for less than I deserve. Who knew there was someone out there that has this much in common with me? From the taste in music to books, authors, hobbies and perspectives. Someone who sees what I see and doesn’t judge the way I go into depth with my thoughts. Someone who appreciates knowledge and thinks outside of the box. Someone that thinks in between the lines. Why must the circumstances be so difficult. Why is it that this attraction would be considered a sin in the eyes of the greater gods? Is it a test of faith? My heart has endured every form of abuse possible. My mind was set that no man will ever be able to impress or satisfy me. Why is it that when my heart is at it’s coldest I meet someone who makes it reconsider? It’s unfortunate to say but the more time I spend with him the more unattracted I become to the other. The fact that our psyche is almost exactly the same sends thrills through my body. I wish I had the answers I really wish I knew but for now we’ll just wait and watch faith be put to the test.